What Parents Can Do For Their Kids

Like many Americans, I have helped keep Tom Brokaw's book, The Greatest Generation, on the "bestseller" lists for many months. It's a stirring tribute to the sacrifices and successes of my parents' generation. In fact, Brokaw's prototype for the generation was born in 1920, the year of my father's birth.

When they might have enjoyed a teenager's foolishness, they had the great depression. When they might have turned college degrees into job offers, they had World War II.

Subsequent generations know nothing of the suffering, fear and delayed gratification that forged discipline, dedication and persistence that we don't really fully appreciate.

Maybe that's part of the reason my generation has been so lousy about our kids and their sports.

The youth sports image of parents today is that, against all odds, we believe our child has a college athletic scholarship in his or her future; we criticize our children, even publicly, for every idle moment or any momentary lapse of focus or proficiency in competition; we challenge the coach regarding decisions on position, playing time and strategy; and we loudly chastise officials for cheating our kids.

Of course, the kids need none of this. Here's what they really need.

Jim Abbott was born without a hand but went on to be a star high school athlete in Flint, Michigan, and to pitch for the University of Michigan baseball team, pitched the United States to a Pan American Games gold medal, and pitch successfully in Major League Baseball. When asked what his father did to prepare him for a major league baseball career, Abbott said: "My dad and I did what was necessary to play catch. We didn't form the basis for a major league career. We just played catch."

What do kids need from us? To just play catch.

They just need a fan. They need a fan, not a fanatic; they need an encourager, not an embarrasser.

They need us to let them live their lives, not relive our lives with all the rough spots smoothed out. They need us to delay our gratification in their lives permanently.

I didn't make this up. This is what my kid told me.

--Jack Roberts
MHSAA Executive Director