Giving Value to Victory

January 13, 2013

The older I get, the longer I pause over sunsets; and I’ve learned that the sunset with the brightest colors, the greatest variety of colors, the most texture, the most uniqueness – the most character – is the sunset on a partly cloudy evening.

As clouds add character to an early evening sky, so do disappointments add character to a life.  And also to that slice of life we call sports.

Without losses in sports, victories are less sweet.

As a player, coach, parent of players and administrator, I’ve come to know with certainty that the experience of defeat is a large part of what gives value to victory.

Butterflies and Helicopters

July 9, 2014

I’m doing as much as I know how to attract butterflies to my garden. For example, I’ve planted a butterfly bush and milkweed plants. I do this because these plants are supposed to attract butterflies and bees, and I know butterflies and bees are essential to producing vegetables.

One of the greatest miracles any person can observe is to watch a butterfly emerge from a cocoon. It was as wondrous to me last summer as the first time I saw it occur when I was a young child, when I first saw a butterfly emerge with damp, shriveled wings. 

I was told then that we shouldn’t interfere, that we shouldn’t help the butterfly escape the cocoon and shouldn’t help spread the wings. We had to let the butterfly struggle. We were instructed that the struggle would give strength to the wings, and that would be essential to the butterfly’s survival.

Childhood is much like this, but too often helicopter parents intervene and interfere with the growth process and, ultimately, weaken their children’s ability to fend for themselves, to overcome adversity and to take flight.

Helicopter parents endanger our butterfly children.