Logo

Parent Problem

October 29, 2013

For years when I have paused in presentations to ask coaches and school administrators to identify the biggest problems we have in school sports, two problems are far most frequently mentioned:

  • Too little money; and
  • Too many misdirected parents.

Other problems are cited; but far and away, the most frequently mentioned problems are under-funding of programs and over-involvement of parents.

In many aspects of the lives of youth, there is too little parent involvement and direction; but such is not the case in most places when it comes to sports. “Helicopter parents” not only hover, they also seek to rescue their children from the very situations – adversity – that sports uses to teach life lessons.

Parents have no role in decisions regarding playing time and game plans. Should parents ever believe that their child has been put at risk in a sports program, there are prompt and appropriate ways to address those situations, directly and with discretion, not gossip and guile.

And the job description of school administrators today must include the staunch defense of the jobs our committed coaches are doing.

Don’t Look Back

November 23, 2011

In August of 1986, at the end of the one week of overlap between the previous MHSAA executive director, Vern Norris, and the start of my tenure, I found an envelope on my desk from Mr. Norris that read:  “No words of advice.  Just make your decisions and don’t look back.”  That’s Lesson No. 5 of six in this series of blogs.

In our work, time is of the essence.  We don’t have the luxury of long deliberations.  The next game may be today; the next round of the tournament tomorrow.

In our work, staff is limited.  We don’t have subpoena power.  We have few staff spread thinly over many responsibilities.

In our work, because it’s in a competitive arena, people are sometimes disingenuous.  Some have personal agendas, impure motives sometimes. They care who wins and loses; we don’t.

And most people have miserable memories.  I’m skeptical that people recall well the details of events; and people are even worse when recalling details of conversations.

So, in our work, we make one more call and then, with good intentions and reliance on rules, we get on with the decision and try not to look back.

It’s hard to do, but a good deal healthier if we can.