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Tough Love

October 9, 2015

A young Korean woman has lived with my wife and me for two years and will for two years longer. Grace is a graduate of the international school in China where our son and his wife were her teachers; and since living with us, she has graduated from Lansing Community College and moved on to Michigan State University.

Having this student in our home and a son and daughter-in-law as educators in China, living with my wife who once was in charge of refugee resettlement for a large agency in mid-Michigan, and my serving for seven years as president of the board of the Refugee Development Center in Lansing, makes me understanding of and sympathetic to international students.

However, I expect that is not the reputation I enjoy among those who work for student exchange organizations and even among some in our schools who work with the increasing number of international students who are enrolling in Michigan’s secondary schools. They probably view me as an advocate for more restrictive transfer rules for international students, especially regarding F-1 visa students and nonpublic schools.

Guilty as charged. Indeed, I do advocate for higher standards for exchange programs, more vigorous oversight of student placements and more equal application of rules, regardless of the type of visa the student has or the type of school in which that student enrolls.

It is because I see great value in our interaction with people from other nations that I want to assure international student exchanges remain popular in our schools. Nothing jeopardizes the future of international student exchange more than sloppy or shady placements of international students, including last-minute dumping of students by agencies, athletic-related direct placements by agents, and school districts loading up on international students as backfill for declining local enrollments.

As some youth escape brutal hardship in war-torn or impoverished countries and more well-off foreign students stampede to the U.S. to attend U.S. secondary schools, colleges and universities, it will require high doses of tough love. If problems related to athletics increase, so will the chances that all international students will lose all opportunities to participate in varsity level sports in this state.

Members of the Same Team

April 2, 2013

The Basketball Coaches Association of Michigan (BCAM) is a leader among our state’s high school coaches associations, as well as of its counterpart organizations for the sport of basketball across the US.

The MHSAA has partnered with BCAM in numerous ways, including the “Reaching Higher” program to help prepare high school student-athletes for the college experience and in the “Top Shooters” and clinic aspects of the “March Magic Hoopfest” which will return in 2014 after taking a year off due to facility conflicts at Michigan State University.

One of the longest MHSAA-BCAM partnerships has been the Basketball Officials and Coaches Communications Committee (BOCCC).  One of the committee members, Mitch Hubbard of Reading High School, offered these candid and insightful comments in BCAM’s March 2013 Monthly Report:

Look Through Someone Else’s Window

Look through someone else’s window was the name of our Sunday school lesson.  The entire lesson was about how we should stop and try to see things the way others do.

I sat through the class nodding my head in agreement.  I kept thinking of situations where if people would do this, many conflicts could be avoided.  If only people would look at both sides of things, then the world would be a better place.

I then thought about the relationships that I have had with officials for the last 27 years.  I have never stopped to think about what the official was thinking or what they might be going through.  I have never even cared much about their feelings or their life happenings.  It has always been about me, my team, and my situation.  I usually think that the “refs” are against me and my team.  How could they call that?  What are they looking at?  What have I ever done to him?  These are the thoughts that led to my usual obnoxious comments or statements.

This season I took on the position of athletic director.  Part of the job is to greet the officials and escort them back and forth to the locker room.  For the first time in my career, I have had good, honest, open conversations with guys that I have known for years.  I found out that these guys have families, careers, injuries, honors, and all kinds of day-to-day happenings.  Some live close by and some travel long distances to referee.  I was amazed as to just how much these guys were like me!

If only I had stopped and taken the time to have a normal conversation with these guys years before, my perception may have been different.  If I would “look through someone else’s window” and realize that officials are normal people, maybe some uncomfortable situations could have been avoided.  I suppose the same goes for officials.  If they would try to see things through the window of the coach, they might see more than a screaming madman.

Officials and coaches want the same thing.  They both love the sport and want to protect it.  We need to work together to improve and enhance the game.  Communication and relationships between officials and coaches is critical.  We need to stop and take the time to “look through someone else’s window” and appreciate them.