Let Life Teach
December 7, 2012
Here’s a golden nugget from Ann Arbor’s Dr. Dan Saferstein’s little book, Win or Lose: A Guide to Sports Parenting:
“Most of us have an easier time being math parents than we do being sports parents. We don’t stand over our children as they’re doing their homework, hollering at them to round to the highest decimal or carry their zero. We trust that they’ll be able to figure things out on their own, and if they can’t, they’ll get the help they need from their teachers or by asking us.
“What a lot of sports parents seem to forget is that young athletes also need the same space to figure things out on their own. They need to learn how to think and make decisions during game situations, which isn’t easy to do when your parent (or someone else’s parent) is shouting out directions.
“The reality is that if your child could score a goal or stop a defender, he would. In most cases, telling your child to move faster to the ball is like telling him to be taller. Effort isn’t the only critical factor in sports, or in math. Some children will never be high-level athletes no matter how hard they try, which is by no means a tragedy. The world doesn’t necessarily need more gymnastics, softball or soccer stars. It needs more young people who are willing to try and make our world a better place.”
Go to dansaferstein.com for more good stuff from the good doctor.
System Failure
October 19, 2012
Almost every week we learn of another college or professional athlete who has exploded in rage, abused a fan or friend, been busted or broken parole, been stopped for speeding or DUI.
Among very many reasons why, one of the greatest may be this: we taught them to behave this way . . . the system caused them to become this way.
Sometimes the positive character traits taught through high school sports are overwhelmed by the extravagant attention given to athletes by the media, college recruiters, ranking services, agents, promoters and sporting equipment/apparel companies. Good kids begin to believe the hype, thinking they're not only above the crowd, but above the law. They go from being self-confident, to self-centered, to self-serving.
There are good reasons that, in school sports, we attempt to restrain the hype and deflect attention from individual to team. We could use some help at home and in the media.