Parent Problem
October 29, 2013
For years when I have paused in presentations to ask coaches and school administrators to identify the biggest problems we have in school sports, two problems are far most frequently mentioned:
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Too little money; and
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Too many misdirected parents.
Other problems are cited; but far and away, the most frequently mentioned problems are under-funding of programs and over-involvement of parents.
In many aspects of the lives of youth, there is too little parent involvement and direction; but such is not the case in most places when it comes to sports. “Helicopter parents” not only hover, they also seek to rescue their children from the very situations – adversity – that sports uses to teach life lessons.
Parents have no role in decisions regarding playing time and game plans. Should parents ever believe that their child has been put at risk in a sports program, there are prompt and appropriate ways to address those situations, directly and with discretion, not gossip and guile.
And the job description of school administrators today must include the staunch defense of the jobs our committed coaches are doing.
Another Way to Learn
October 30, 2012
In 2000, I had the pleasure of listening to a speech by Ken Dryden, who had been goalkeeper for Cornell University when it was the NCAA Ice Hockey Champion in the 1960s. Ken Dryden then was a goalkeeper in the National Hockey League for eight years. Then president of the Toronto Maple Leafs, and he’s a lawyer.
Ken Dryden said that the greatest lesson of sport is that most things go wrong; in fact, that they almost always go wrong. He said he’s seen dozens of coaches on hundreds of occasions diagram plays in the locker room where every defender is blocked just so and every pattern is executed perfectly.
But what you learn in competition, said Dryden, is that the plans almost always go awry, that the patterns almost always break down. What you learn in competition is to not get upset, but to improvise and find another way to get the puck in the goal or the ball in the net.
What happens to the high school student, asked Dryden, who doesn’t play sports in high school and who gets all A’s, a 4.3 grade point average on a 4 point scale, 100 percent on test scores all the time, who never has anything go wrong? What happens to that student in college when he or she gets 90 percent, or 80 percent, or worse. What happens to that student when something goes wrong in life?
Dryden concluded that sport is not frivolous, it’s another way to learn.