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Improving Over the Long Run

October 22, 2013

A participant in a 5K run told me recently that when she first entered races, her goal was just to finish. After those early successes, her goal in entering races was to improve her personal best time.

It was only after several years of consistent improvement that she entertained the thought of actually trying to attain a spot in the top 20. Eventually, a “Top 10” and then a “Top 5” finish became the goal. And only recently has she made it a goal to try to win one of these races.

This is a wise way to approach sports. Engage at first to improve your health and fitness. Then to enhance your speed, coordination and/or endurance. Then to test the limits of your abilities. And only then to test yourself against others.

Adults might look to this as a natural, healthy way to improve themselves in almost any endeavor. And adults who are coaching youth should look to it as a healthy way to lead young people to improve both as athletes and as human beings.

Butterflies and Helicopters

July 9, 2014

I’m doing as much as I know how to attract butterflies to my garden. For example, I’ve planted a butterfly bush and milkweed plants. I do this because these plants are supposed to attract butterflies and bees, and I know butterflies and bees are essential to producing vegetables.

One of the greatest miracles any person can observe is to watch a butterfly emerge from a cocoon. It was as wondrous to me last summer as the first time I saw it occur when I was a young child, when I first saw a butterfly emerge with damp, shriveled wings. 

I was told then that we shouldn’t interfere, that we shouldn’t help the butterfly escape the cocoon and shouldn’t help spread the wings. We had to let the butterfly struggle. We were instructed that the struggle would give strength to the wings, and that would be essential to the butterfly’s survival.

Childhood is much like this, but too often helicopter parents intervene and interfere with the growth process and, ultimately, weaken their children’s ability to fend for themselves, to overcome adversity and to take flight.

Helicopter parents endanger our butterfly children.