Anniversary Celebration

May 9, 2017

Mixing work and family obligations is not recommended for marital bliss; and I’ve done pretty well over the years at not taking my work home to the extent that my family felt like the second team. However, once a year I insist that my wife comes to work with me. That was last Saturday night.

The Michigan High School Athletic Association’s Officials Awards & Alumni Banquet occurs each May, just about the time I should be considering a nice night out for my wife as we celebrate our wedding anniversary and Mother’s Day. So, one might think I am asking for trouble by making this event our big night out.

Yet it works. For if there is one thing the Officials Banquet demonstrates, it’s the power of partners and family.

Time after time last Saturday evening, officials thanked spouses for their support. For keeping late dinners hot and uniforms clean, of course; but also for savoring the stories that sports officials have so many of and share so vividly.

Officials know what it means to have a partner, and to have his or her back in good times and bad.

Officials are a part of a big family of people with affinity for one another that often grows into deep and abiding, lifelong affection.

It wasn’t just longevity that was applauded last Saturday; partners and extended families were honored as well. Not a bad way to celebrate a 45th wedding anniversary.

Reserve Lessons

January 26, 2018

Nothing prepared me for coaching more than the time I spent sitting on the bench. I hated it. And when I started coaching, I couldn’t forget how much I disliked sitting on the bench, and I did everything I could do to get every player in a game every week on some level – 9th grade, JV or varsity.

So I get it. Not starting hurts. Not playing stinks. And while many coaches are brilliant in their tactics to share playing time, some coaches do a miserable job of getting reserves into games.

But having said all that, I must add that too many people undervalue the importance of reserves, of the practice players who work hard to make the regulars better. Many champion wrestlers and tennis players earned their titles because of practice partners who pushed them to be better day-in and day-out. Many championship teams achieved their success through arduous daily competition in practice all season long. Many times it has been a so-called “backup” player, who worked hard in practices and who was often worked into games by caring coaches, who steps in after a starter is injured and saves the season.

There is much to be learned as a reserve, including what it means to be a loyal teammate ... a team player ... and what teamwork and sacrifice and loyalty and dedication really mean.

I have said often in speeches that it’s my wish that every student would have the opportunity to be a starter in one sport and a substitute in another because the lessons to be learned from each are different and so vital to developing the whole person.

It is a shame that students have somehow gotten the message that it’s a waste of their time to be a part of a team where they aren’t a starter or even the star. They get this message from adults ... sometimes it’s coaches, but more often it’s parents who criticize coaches and/or transfer their children to schools where they have a greater chance for athletic success.

As the benches get shorter on our school sports teams, the lessons learned get fewer.